No Rest for the Wicked...

For the past week, I have been trying to figure out what exactly I have done wrong.  Last weekend, I had an overnight code push to help perform.  I spent most of the day and night working on that.  I finally got to bet at 4 AM, only to be woken up at 4:30 AM from someone calling if they could turn on the scheduler.

When I finally woke, about 3.5 hours later, I had the worst sore throat.  I am a complete baby when it comes to that.  Also, the evil stuffy head/nose combo rides right behind it.  I have no time for that.  I suppose none of that matters - No matter what I did to avoid all of this mess came barreling down on me by Monday.

Sore throat has diminished considerably by this point.  However, I still have the hacking cough and stuffy nose that cannot decide if it should stop up and drip, or consistently have me running for the tissue get all of that gunk out of it.  I hate this.  I am miserable and I have another code push to work again this weekend.  Oh, the cherry on the top - I have to do on-call duty this week.

Therefore - my statement - No rest for the wicked.  What in the world did I do for this?  I laugh at the bad luck I am experiencing.  But, it is a little discouraging.  No one wants to work or clean or cook when they are sick.  Myself, I would rather just lie in bed and try to sleep off this mess.  Unfortunately, "LIFE" won't let me.

A few weeks ago, I applied for a new position within the company.  One that I would hope would reduce the amount of responsibilities (and stress) I have.  I feel that the job would add another feather into my cap to learn about the warehouse and how it works.  The new position would be working in the development and QA areas.  That suits me just fine.  My problem is that certain people are trying to instill doubt that this is a good move for me.  Others have said that it would be a good choice.  I learn this aspect of the company, should I decide to leave, there are plenty of jobs out in the world for this sort of work.

The opportunity to reduce the amount of responsibility and learn something new is scary, even nerve-wrecking.  However, I really want this.  I want this job for the opportunity to learn something new as well as as a fresh start.  Learn something from the ground up - take the things I know and mold them for use here and forget about other stuff that do not apply.  Understand how this area of the company "lives".  My current "living" environment has become just too intrusive. 

Just let me go - no hard feelings - this is about me and what I needed to do to fix my current situation.  I cannot depend on the promises of others that take forever to come to life.  I had to do something now.  It just bothers me that one would try to make me feel bad for making this choice.

God's message to me today:

Today, we believe God wants you to know that ...

it's time to start living in the present.

Letting go of the past is not easy, especially if you have wounds that have never properly healed. But, the past is past and living there may be preventing you from fully experiencing the present. Likewise fear of what may be looming around the corner can also prevent you from fully enjoying the present. Live in the moment and look forward to eternity with God, now that's a great present.