Sunday, December 29, 2013

Reflecting on Life...

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!  I had a good Christmas.  I decided to just kick back and reflect on life in general this Christmas.  I made some efforts to give a bit more to those who need it.  However, rather than get wrapped up in all of the material things, I wanted to concentrate my mind on those non-material things that only *I* can provide to myself.

One of the things that really hit me was that I am always negative when it comes to myself.  I do not love myself as I really should.  I thought about that.  I guess I allowed those nutty people who were rude to me in the past to affect me.  Sure, there are some things about myself I would love to change, but those things are exactly was makes me "me."

I have never been happy with my body.  Well, I weigh over 300 lbs and it is not something I am proud to say out loud.  However, *I* can change that.  That is something within my control and I MUST make that effort NO MATTER WHAT!  No one else can do it for me.  Weight loss surgery is not something I consider lightly and short cuts will only give you issues in the long run.  Losing the weight slowly is the best way and I must learn a LOT of patience with losing weight.

Today, I measured my A1C.  I purchased some additional blood testing strips as I needed them and I finally broke down and bought the A1C Now Self Check.  As of today, my A1C is 8.5.  That is not great, but the positive part is that a year ago, my A1C was 13.2, which is horrible!  So, I have improved considerably with medication.  However, I know I can do better by losing the weight.  There is my motivation.  I want to see my A1C get to 6.5 and that is my long term goal.

Love.  While I really did not get much for Christmas, I realized that there was not anything I really had to have or wanted.  So, I was not disappointed with not getting any material things for Christmas.  I was able to spend time with my father and that was important.  However, I do wish that there was someone who was special for me to spend time. 

No comments:

Post a Comment