Saturday, January 31, 2015

Sometimes, You Have to Learn to Care for Yourself...

It is true.  In this life, you cannot depend on everyone taking care of you and whatever issues you have.  It is a hard, slap in the face lesson you have to learn, but sometimes, you just have to pull up the big boy/girl pants and do it yourself.

I faced this issue when I found out I had type II diabetes.  I appreciate the friends who actually care about that and want to help.  However, bottom line, it is not their responsibility to figure out what I can and cannot eat.  It is a daily battle I have to manage.  

Another person I know was complaining that people really do not get how to prepare food for diabetics.  Apparently, a neighbor had invited her over for dinner and prepared a dish with pasta.  All she could do was focus on the fact that they cared nothing for her having diabetes.  

All I could do was just look at her.  The entire time I wanted to scream "It was a free dinner!!!!  Show some appreciation and do your best not to over do it.  MANAGING YOUR DISEASE IS YOUR PROBLEM - NOT THEIRS!"  

It is a tough lesson to learn.  However, there is so much truth in it.  Having to manage this "little friend" I carry with me is pretty exhausting and frustrating.  It is a struggle, but expecting people to understand as well as cater to you - yeah, that is not going to happen.  You have to manage this yourself.  

Proper diet and exercise are the keys to success when managing diabetes.  Sure, you take your meds and such, but do not expect people to make food choices for you.  That is your battle to take.  Honestly, I do not want someone nagging me about what I am eating.

You know, I have gotten angry over having to eat dinner at someone's house where I got food I could not eat.  Bottom line, they do not have to deal with diabetes, so why should they alter their meal to adhere to what I can eat?  Furthermore, you can end up eating a really rotten meal out of that because they really do not know how to prepare that sort of thing.  So, I learned to just allow that to be a special occasion and get back on with it.

Now, because of my diabetes, I am more considerate of others with special eating needs.  Someone is a vegan, I will make an effort to check a restaurant for suitable options before picking it.  If the place is vegan, perfect.  Otherwise, I will keep checking for proper options.  I have been down that road myself.  If the only choice is salad, then that is not good enough.  I like salads just like anyone else, but come on.

I will say that there is a cultural issue with the work place.  For those whose religions prevent them for eating meats, the work place will work with them more than those of us who have other specific needs.  Any work group "happy hour" or such that we have put together, I have to be very careful to make sure that there are plenty of vegetarian dishes.  Of course, I never have a problem with someone bringing something that fits their needs.  

I read an article the other day about a woman who sent her child to a birthday party.  Her daughter cannot handle refined sugar and needs a gluten-free diet.  The mother had brought with her a gluten-free cupcake for the daughter to eat while the other kids had cake and such.  Her complaint was that all of the other parents made noise about that and how it was not fair to the daughter.  

You know, I do not believe that would have bothered me.  She has special needs and the mother sent something so that the girl would not have been out of place.  Think about it.  I do not know how many times I went without lunch because the manager ordered pizza and something was said about my not eating the crust.  Not like this manager was not told about my having diabetes, but the point - it is my problem to manage.  Probably would have been better to have brought my lunch and ate it.  I still would have had to face scrutiny, but you know what, I am dealing with my issues and it is not their problem.  At the end of the day, I will feel better about what I did and how I handled it.

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