Transitions...

Yesterday, I met with my trainer for my weekly workout.  I have about 5 to 6 sessions left to go on my current contract.  I have already decided, due to finances, that I need to forgo the personal trainer and work on getting workouts done on my own.

Luckily, I joined YMCA last year and the one close to my apartment complex offers a lot of group exercise classes.  So, rather than paying extra to attend these types of classes, it is part of my monthly dues.  I consider that a huge bonus.

I have been examining the schedule and figure the next steps are to try to attend the body shredding class and one of the yoga classes.  My trainer teaches the body shred course, so I will feel comfortable going to that.  Yoga - that is another story.  However, the point is not what others think, but what I am doing for myself.

I made the comment yesterday to someone regarding riding a bike.  When I was much younger, I had a bike and I would ride it in the neighborhood a lot.  When we moved to Texas, I quit riding my bike.  One can only think of why I quit - angry I moved, not happy with the kids in the neighborhood - who knows?

Anyway, I said I do not feel comfortable riding a bike due to the comments made when overweight people get on a bike to ride.  I remember vividly.  I was in the back of my team lead's car and three of us, two men and myself, heading out for Chinese food for lunch.  The one guy who got a lap band made a snarky comment regarding an overweight woman riding a bike.  Another time, I thought it would be cool to get a scooter to ride back and forth to work and I got another snarky comment from the same idiot.  (Yes, I call him an idiot because he thinks his comments are funny and he cares nothing for your feelings; he only cares about himself.)

It is sad that it comes down to that, but that crap sticks in my head.  While deep down, I know I should not care, I do.  I hate that it is like that.  I hate that there are people out there who are like that and I know them.  It is an awful battle to fight when you feel there is no way to win.

However, I know I must push on through and do this.  I have no other choice.  I have to learn to get past that fear and those voices and do this.