The Pain You Never See...

As we go through life, none of us know what battles the others are facing.  We have no idea of the pain others are trying to manage.  That is the pain no one ever sees - you look fine on the outside, but inside, you are full of either physical or emotional pain.

Most of my life, I spent dealing with bullying and ridicule.  I was never a "thin" person - I was always overweight.  Even at the one time in my life where I was under 200 lbs, I was still overweight.  It never mattered what I had done, I still had to manage with the name calling.  Even worse, I was horrible at athletics.  Only once when I had lost a good bit of weight, I was running that one 8th grade girl said I was fast for a fat girl.

I was proud, but still, there it was.  I am "fat."  

Today, I am still "fat."  Now, I have type 2 diabetes and deal with various back and leg issues.  Other than being overweight, I seem fine on the outside, but I am not.  

I know I hide my pain by eating.  I eat when I am bored or stressed.  I eat when I feel down or upset.  

So, let's change the focus here.  Think about someone else.  That person could be thin and maybe they cut themselves to feel better.  You never see the marks because they are good a covering them.  Another person has dealt with a lot of physical pain, but there are no bruises or scars.  That person is dependent upon pain killers to help them manage the pain.

I am often guilty of lashing out at others.  I know that is because I hold back so much.  The reason for that is because I was taught never to say anything.  I must not be rude to others.  However, holding in so much emotion is not good, either.

There have been plenty of times when I have regretted things I have said or done.  At the same time, I try to always be kind to others.  I just do not know what other people are managing in their lives.  Maybe, it would be nice if we all tried to be nicer to one another.  We need to quit hurting one another more than ever.