Friday, February 25, 2011

Gone off the wagon...

It was bound to happen at some point.  Work became extremely busy and I totally got wrapped up in that.  Been eating really lousy and that is bound to show.

Just going to watch "The Ugly Truth" and try to regroup.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Not feeling too well...

Morning Blood Sugar:  239
Afternoon Blood Sugar:  171
Evening Blood Sugar:  332

Well, I suppose that is what I get for eating pizza.  The hand-tossed crust killed my blood sugar numbers. 

I spent a better part of my day either napping, as I did not feel well, or sitting in front of the work computer trying to get work done.  Tomorrow, I hope to wrap up my "work" stuff by 2 PM, so I can at least relax for the rest of the weekend.

I also made out the plan for getting my remaining credit card debit paid.  If I can stick to it, I should get it done within the year.  If I can get that gorilla off my back, I might feel better about taking a lower paying job.  Actually, it would help me determine the amount of money that is acceptable.  It is definitely something I want to get off my back and get that stress out of my life.

I wish and dream that I could win the lottery.  That way, I would be able to go back to school.  I would love to get my masters.  I just cannot see doing it due to all of the other interference.

Time to take the doggies to bed and get some rest.

Friday, February 11, 2011

TGIF...

Morning Blood Sugar:  244
Evening Blood Sugar:  196

All I had to eat all day was a Fuddrucker's bacon cheeseburger and some fries.  The day was just filled with too much stuff to do.  By the time I got home, I walked the dogs, hit an ice patch, slid and fell right on my butt.  It was embarrassing, but I got up and finished up the walk with the dogs.

When I got back home, I read the documentation that the vet gave to me on Bo and Chloe.  I stretched out on the sofa and crashed for about 3 hours.  I must have been really exhausted.  I ordered a pizza and some cinna stix.

I did not totally pig out.  Just wanted to get that out of my system.

I had to take Bo and Chloe to the vet today.  Both have really bad allergies and do nothing but scratch.  Bo had a staph infection.  Both had their anal glands expressed - I know, ewww.  They think Chloe's are infected as what came out did not look quite right.  The entire visit cost $353.  Wow...

Time to give Bo and Chloe their meds and hit the hay.  I have a busy weekend.  I need to look for a less stressful job.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Way too stressed out...

Morning Blood Sugar:  233
Afternoon Blood Sugar:  194
Evening Blood Sugar:  310

I lost it today.  That is pretty much how I describe it.  I was on 3 phone calls, I had so many people pinging me to give them either information, files, or help.  On top of that, I had two dogs hounding me for going out as well as showing how miserable they were with scratching and whining.  I just lost it.

I cried while begging for some help and that just kills me.  I have a lot of worries and concerns, but I also had lots of people hounding me to fix things I have really no control over.

Then, I went to dinner with someone, who spent the time describing how well her blood sugar was going.  Ugh - my fight is frustrating at best.  I cannot seem to get anything under control.  I also have to wonder if that "Time of the Month" has something to do with my stress and numbers.  Tonight, however, eating that brownie sundae did no favors, but she wanted dessert.  I allowed myself to fall into that trap.

I did, however, only eat half of my lemon caper chicken dinner with broccoli.  I was immensely proud of myself, but I think that was due to the fact that had nachos earlier and was getting sick to my stomach.

Tomorrow has to be a better day...then again, when you know what is coming down the pike, it seems rather bleak.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Quickie Entry...

Morning Blood Sugar:  208
Evening Blood Sugar:  240

Another stressful day and it is still not over.  I hope that it will calm down to allow me to get some sleep.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

The Highs and Lows...

Morning Blood Sugar:  324
Evening Blood Sugar:  211

My morning blood sugar just sucked.  However, it went down over 100 points.  I am quite happy with those results.  I will be happy when I can get my blood sugar under 200 every day.

I think PMS is approaching.  I noticed that I do not have much patience with the dogs.  I think that is due to being overwhelmed with a lot to do and people won't leave me alone to concentrate.  I hate it when I make mistakes, but it is even worse when I am constantly distracted. 

I guess I need to find time to just chill.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Stressful Monday...

Morning Blood Sugar:  237
Evening Blood Sugar:  253

I am still recovering from Sunday's FUBAR dinner.  It is going to be okay.  Today was really stressful because I am on-call this week and both dogs have been scratching like crazy.  I have yet to figure out the deal with Bo and Chloe.

I am a little disturbed with trying to talk with my father.  When I call, he never seems to want to talk and if he does talk, it is only for at most 10 minutes.  It always feels like when I call, he really does not want to bother.  I really miss my mom.  It never mattered when I called; my mom was always there to listen and help talk through things.  I would give anything to have her back in my life, but I know that will not happen.

I am going to refuse to fall into the pit of self-pitty (what a strange sentence).  I spent the past year mourning over my mom.  It has not been easy because *now* I realize how much I relied on her to be there.  Not for anything specific like getting money or something like that.  Just knowing that she was there and I could call and talk about anything.  I could expand on my frustrations with work and very personal things.

On a positive note, I found some low carb white breat.  Wonder Smart makes a white bread where two slices are 17g of carbs.  It tastes a lot like regular white bread.  That is a bonus.

Screwed up...

For 2/7/2011:

Morning Blood Sugar:  200
Evening Blood Sugar:  289

Well, nachos are a definite no-no.  I figured as much, but I needed to get that out of my system.  I did come up with what seems like a fabulous dinner idea.  I am going to grill some boneless chicken breasts, then use the left over Velveeta/Ro-Tel sauce, homemade avocado salsa (almost guacamole), sour cream, and black olives to cover it.  Add some spanish rice and black beans, that could be a really good dinner.  :-)  I am going to try that and see how well it turns out.  I will post the results.

Today is going to be a really busy day.  I just hope it is not too crazy.  Here is hoping for a better blood sugar day.  I need to make a sandwich and cut up some fruit for lunch today.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Break through...

Morning Blood Sugar:  193
Evening Blood Sugar:  190

Can you believe it?!  I cracked the upper 100s today and stayed there!  I feel great about that!  Of course, I know tomorrow, it will jump back up in the 200s for whatever stupid reason, but right now, I feel really great.  Tomorrow, I will continue to work hard on keeping my blood sugar down.

I need to end here - I have Chloe growling at me to go to bed.  The problem is that I need to fix my sandwich before I hit the hay.  If I eat a small sandwich, my blood sugar will not spike.  That is my goal!  :-)

Getting ahead...somewhat...

I spent most of the week iced in by the bad weather.  I worked from home and got a lot of stuff done, but my housework still took a backseat.  Today, I have managed to get a load of dishes done, two loads of laundry, vacuumed a dog hair covered apartment, and put out shrimp for dinner.  I hope to make butter garlic shrimp, left over roasted veggies, and rice.  That should help my blood sugar.

I did remember to take my vitamins this morning.  Also, my blood sugar was under 200!  Super bonus!  I just have to keep up making the right food choices.  For lunch today, it will be soup and salad.  I have some "work" work to do, but hopefully, nothing too stressful.  I also need to clear out some of the unnecessary clutter, such as old flyers, magazines, and other "trash".  I hope to sit down and do my budget before dinner, then give myself a manicure.

All my life, I have chewed on my fingernails.  I suppose that is one of the ways I deal with stress.  I know my other way is eating.  I wish I were not so heavy - I do love good food and within the past few years, I have tried to cook good food to eat.  With the diabetes, I am simply trying to cook good food that will inspire me to continue to eat well without giving up those great tastes.

I better get back to the house work.  I have a ton of laundry to fold, so that will keep me pretty busy.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Working for the weekend...

Morning Blood Sugar:  200
Evening Blood Sugar:  241

Well, started close to breaking the upper 100s.  I am trying not to discourage myself on these numbers primarily if my blood sugar was starting at 100 and ended at 140, that would be a good day.  Basically, I had a 40 point separation from this morning to tonight.  That is "normal".  The numbers are a better indicator of the fact that I am still trying to lower the existing blood sugar numbers from the beginning of January.  It took me 2 to 3 months to get to that point back in 2006-2007. 

On 12/05/2006, I took my first diabetes course to learn how to manage my disease.  It was there I learned more about measuring my carb intake.  Like I did then, I am focusing just on the carb value for intake and not the calories.  After awhile, it seems like counting so many different things gets depressing and I start feeling deprived.  That is not the goal here.

I have spent most of the week working from home due to the inclement weather conditions.  I have noticed that I am failing to eat a decent breakfast in the mornings and take my vitamin supplements.  I need to make sure I eat something for breakfast and take my vitamins.  I am taking fish oil, cinnamon, calcium, and potassium.  The fish oil and cinnamon are to help with lowering my blood sugar.  The calcium and potassium help with easing leg and foot muscle cramps and provide me with more energy.  Apparently, my last A1C test showed I was vitamin D deficient, so that explained why I was always dragging.

I know this weather has been causing my skin to dry out.  That is not good for my hands because the skin will start to crack open and bleed.  The dogs are scratching like crazy.  I have been making sure that both Bo and Chloe get their Benedryl, but they are still scratching.  I brushed out Bo and that did not seem to help.  I think both dogs have dry skin, so tomorrow, I am going to give them some fish oil.

Seems "Princess" Chloe wants to go to bed, so night all.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Beautiful snow...

Morning Blood Sugar:  197
Evening Blood Sugar:  244

It was a pretty stressful day.  Just now, I stepped outside and looked at the beautiful snow.  I had just taken the dogs out for a walk - on the ice.  When we came back, I took a shower to feel better.  Everyone on FaceBook had mentioned how it was snowing where they were, but it had not reached my area.  I figured as soon as I got out of the shower, the snow would be on its way.

I took a picture.  It was so peaceful and beautiful.  The snow will make it easier to walk the dogs tomorrow.

Positive point of the day - I broke the upper 100 barrier for a morning test.  I hope that this is a beginning of a good trend.

Next, I am going to start a back up of this Dell laptop.  Going to continue to work on getting my blood sugar down.  I know it will take some time and I see progress.  I must not get discouraged.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Frozen Wednesday...

Morning Blood Sugar:  224
Evening Blood Sugar:  248

I did not have lower blood sugar in the evening, but I can handle the 20 point difference.  I had some left over meatloaf for lunch and cheese and crackers for a snack.  For breakfast, I had fruit and 2 sausage patties.  Tomorrow, rather than having something with pasta, I am going to fix some sort of fish to eat.  That would help me with my blood sugar.  I think a nice sandwich and crisp veggies for lunch.

This weather has made walking the dogs a miserable chore.  Bo and Chloe pull and I am trying to keep from slicing or worse falling on the ice.  I know that the situation must be stressful on them as well as me.  I wish I had a house, so that it would be easier for all of us.  However, I will just have to make due with the current situation.

This weekend, I need to work on cleaning up the apartment.  When my mom got really sick and after she passed away, I have not been able to keep up with everything.  The place looks a mess and I know I need to take time off and just clean and clean.  More or less, toss a bunch of crap out of the place.  My problem is that it is so difficult to get time for myself to do everything.  This weekend, I need to force myself to at least do some straightening up and break down the chore into smaller, more manageable projects.

I hope to get my blood sugar down into the upper 100s by some time next week.  If I can see some progress, that would help.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

The frustration ensues...

Morning Blood Sugar:  228
Evening Blood Sugar:  356

Hmmmm...looks like I cannot do meatloaf like mom used to cook.  Pasta always messes up my blood sugar.  *huge sigh*  I have to keep plugging along and get this right.  I guess what really bothers me is that I picked a whole wheat pasta and still, my blood sugar hits the roof.  It is really deflating, but I have to get past this.

I neglected to eat breakfast this morning.  I got distracted with work and just kept plugging along with everything until about noon.  At that point, I ate some left over chinese food, then had a sugar free pudding.  Around 4 PM, I had some pretzels and two pickles.  Weird I know, but it killed my need for food.

The ice/snow storm from overnight did not do me much for me.  The bitter cold made my fingers hurt so badly that I cried.  I ran warm water over them to get the circulation flowing.  To really tick me off, I had gloves on to protect my hands.  Geez...

Tomorrow will be a better day for me health wise.  I can make this happen.  At some point, I will be brave enough to post my weight.  I am just too embarrassed to do that.  I already face the facts that I am overweight - I see that in the mirror every day.

Here is to a better tomorrow!