Saturday, March 17, 2012

Crazy times...

Most of the week was spent wrapped up doing work.  On two separate occasions, I had to either cancel or delay plans I made.  I wish that those things would not happen.

For the past couple of days, I have been fortunate to see my blood sugar numbers in the upper 200s.  I have seen my blood sugar spike a few times to 400, but that was after having eaten something that would spike it.  Majority of the time, my blood sugar would go back to a lower number a few hours after that.

I am still not thrilled about sticking myself with a needle.  However, I am glad to be off of Metformin.  Now, Metformin is a good drug for managing diabetes.  My problem was the side effect with running to the bathroom and not to pee.  Some days, I could manage to stay home with the stomach issues.  If I went to work and that mess started, you could forget anything productive until the Immodium AD started working or it passed.  I know it helped with the weight loss back in 2006-2007, but one can only handle that for so long.

I continue my quest for making healthy food that I enjoy eating.  I am determined to prove that I can manage this disease, but also get healthy by eating really good food at the same time.  I was talking to a friend of mine back from my TCJC/UNT days, Kendra.  She had gained a good bit of weight and considered weight loss surgery.  After looking at what all was involved and just the thought of throwing up food, she chucked the idea and started walking.  Now, she is up to using an elliptical and going to the gym.  She has increased her endurance considerably as well with her added exercise

Kendra told me that she had lost 95 lbs.  While that is important to her, what is more important is just getting healthy.  I have to agree with that.  I know people who have had various weight loss surgeries and were successful with them.  However, they all have their various side effects.  I just want to get healthy and no surgery.  It is very possible to lose weight by eating better and just "moving."  Right now, I am trying to get myself to the point to tell people "no" and start making time out for "me."  It is very important.

On my way home from getting a mani/pedi and doing some shopping, I heard Bridge Over Troubled Waters and broke down crying in the car.  The song made me think of my mom.  I miss getting her advice, telling me how I need to suck it up, or just hearing her laugh over whatever stupid question I had, then give me the answer I needed to hear.  I thought about how alone I am here.  I really do not have anyone in my life and it is because I have let other things take over for too long.  Is it too late to reclaim my life?

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